Your Child's Growing Mind by Jane Healy

Author:Jane Healy [Healy, Jane]
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 978-0-307-78894-8
Publisher: Harmony/Rodale
Published: 2011-04-20T00:00:00+00:00

Missed Lessons

I once tested a little boy who was labeled a “misfit” in second grade. His teacher thought he might have a learning disability because he was unable to remember the simplest directions. He had difficulty answering questions and often “said the wrong thing” to other children. After testing Paul, I knew exactly what she meant. He looked terrified when asked a question; tears actually appeared in his eyes several times when he had to express an idea. He needed to have most questions repeated, and he couldn’t say back more than three numbers in a row, but he was good at block puzzles and making sense out of pictures. This profile is, indeed, typical of children who have language disabilities, and I was quite confident of my diagnosis until Paul’s father came to pick him up and asked to see me privately.

“I don’t want to blame my wife for Paul’s problem,” he confided, “but she doesn’t have much patience. Actually, she yells at the kids all the time—sometimes she even swears and puts them down in a real nasty way. Our other ones fight back, but Paul just acts like he doesn’t hear it at all. I feel terrible telling you this, but I thought you should know.”

So much for my clear-cut diagnosis! How much did Paul’s negative experiences with listening and conversation have to do with his language disability? The “problem” was a real one at the time I saw him, but its source remains open to speculation. Learning to “tune out” had enabled him to survive at home, but it wasn’t helping at school! We tried to help his mother understand Paul’s needs, and a specialist worked with him on the skills of listening and expressing himself. Now a teenager, he is still a “loner” who has trouble relating socially to his classmates. I often wonder what would have happened if his first language teacher had taken the time to give him all the lessons.

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